Reflection

Last night my friends Roy and Diane invited me to join them in attending a concert at Ashford Manor. Every summer Ashford Manor holds a series of outdoor concerts. It is quite a spectacle and a lot of fun for a people watcher like me. I suppose this is what put me in the mood I was in last night and in large part the reason for the blog I posted.

While I had a good time and enjoyed the company, I once again found myself feeling much like a third wheel. This is not due to being with my friends. On the contrary, if it were not for them I certainly would not have attended. It is simply because these days I tend to feel alone in a sea of people. Even in a large crowd I feel very much alone and singular. I suppose the walk back to the truck kind of puts it in perspective. I come alone and I leave alone with nobody to discuss the evening with or to laugh with. It was just a quiet walk back to the truck. While these events are somewhat uncomfortable for me in an unnatural way, I feel that I must force myself to get out and meet folks.

I am better this evening but still thinking about what I posted last night. A person that is very special to me put it into perspective for me today. They said that there is a middle ground out there somewhere. Being a mature adult, if and when I do find someone to spend my life with, I will no doubt find someone that will also be mature and able to understand my situation. They will not ever expect me to completely forget.