I finally feel like I am in a place that will allow me to breathe a little bit. So, I finally did something that many have encouraged me to do for some time now. This is a big move and I have not taken my decision in this area lightly. I have thought about this move many times and have been close to pulling the trigger on it more than once. (Okay, maybe I could have chosen a better way to describe this than “pulling the trigger”. Get back in your chair and continue reading) You can also imagine that I wonder how Lisa might feel about this step. I have had more than one person also try to push me forward in this area.
My little buddy Jamie has been pestering the crap out of me since just about day one. She has all but mandated that I take this step. She has chastised me, cajoled me, and even attempted to shame me into it. She would not rest until I took this step. She has texted me, e-mailed me and called me for over two years. She has continued to badger me and has been unrelenting and un apologetic the entire time. I of course know, while she has been aggravating, abrasive and overbearing, she just loves me and only wants to help me move forward.
Others have just patiently and methodically gave me gentle persuasion. Softly pushing me and encouraging me to take this step. They have not pushed too hard nor too often. They have just nudged me from time to time. They too just want me to be able to breathe and move forward and be happy and content.
This in comparison to Jamie’s “baseball bat to the head approach” is a more palatable and never unwelcome approach.
So yes I did it, I really did it… I took that big step that probably every widower and maybe widow has at minimum talked about or at least considered while sitting in the dark alone at night. It’s a step that some feel more comfortable in taking early on while some travel far on this path before they realize it’s time. Then again, some I think, just cave in and can’t stand continuing another step without making this all important change.
My friends, it is now my time… I wanted you all to hear it from me. There is a new woman in my life… I finally hired a part time housekeeper!
Maybe Jamie will stop haunting me now?
- Chris Anderson
- Watkinsville, Georgia, United States
- We lost my beautiful wife of 20 years on 9/12/07. Lisa was my world she was my everything and now she is gone. We are learning to live without Lisa now. I say we because I am not alone. My children are stuck in this mess with me. These are my notes, my vent, my way of letting you all know that we are doing well (some days). This is for myself, my friends and my family that want to know how we are doing and what we are up to. Along the way I hope this might also help someone else who has been dealt a similar hand.