About Me

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Watkinsville, Georgia, United States
We lost my beautiful wife of 20 years on 9/12/07. Lisa was my world she was my everything and now she is gone. We are learning to live without Lisa now. I say we because I am not alone. My children are stuck in this mess with me. These are my notes, my vent, my way of letting you all know that we are doing well (some days). This is for myself, my friends and my family that want to know how we are doing and what we are up to. Along the way I hope this might also help someone else who has been dealt a similar hand.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Gods Plan vs My Plan

I don’t know what’s gotten into me but I am on a roll.

After my last posting I sat down took a look at what I else I need to be working toward. I realized how much time has been wasted over the last two years. Well, maybe wasted is too strong a word. I suppose I have been bogged down by the whole grief process. Grief is, after all, hard work. It takes a lot out of a person physically and mentally. Anyhow, at this point I do have a number of irons in the fire and hope that I can keep them all hot.

I suppose the new roof and getting the shop near completion has really spurred me on. The place looks so much better with the new roof. No longer do I come home and dread looking up at the rotted gutters and nasty old roof. I am proud of how the house is starting to look and it is way past due.
The other thing that I thought about was that I better be careful not to go too far in the other direction. I need to slow down just a little bit and take stock of what I am doing so as not to make a costly mistake. I don’t want to start ripping down walls and such until I have thought out the long term plan and included everything in that plan that I need to.

The thing is, I have a hard time making plans these days due to the demolition of the plans that me and Lisa had made. I have learned that my plan might not be Gods plan. So, I have tended to shy away from making too much in the way of long term plans. I have to force myself to think in the future now whereas before it came easily. I always knew, or thought that I knew what the future would be for me. Now that I realize that my future plans may not even come close to becoming reality, it really is hard to put the effort into that thought process.

Be that as it may, I don’t want to slow my forward progress too much and certainly don’t want to see it stop. It feels too good seeing the payoff that I get from these things that I am working on.

2 comments:

  1. I think that in doing all of these things for the house you are living in the "now", more than the future, and that's a good thing. We both know that everything can change in the blink of an eye, but we also know that God wants us to live for now.
    I'm glad it feels good to see your progress .... on your list and in your life.
    Janine

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  2. You are doing a great job. It's like we tell our children, head in a direction that you may believe is the direction God is leading you. At least "your heading in a direction" if God has a different plan he will lead you and guide you his word say's so. God has something great instore for you.
    Love you Meinda

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