- Chris Anderson
- Watkinsville, Georgia, United States
- We lost my beautiful wife of 20 years on 9/12/07. Lisa was my world she was my everything and now she is gone. We are learning to live without Lisa now. I say we because I am not alone. My children are stuck in this mess with me. These are my notes, my vent, my way of letting you all know that we are doing well (some days). This is for myself, my friends and my family that want to know how we are doing and what we are up to. Along the way I hope this might also help someone else who has been dealt a similar hand.
Monday, May 18, 2009
It Is What It Is
One of the tools that I have tried to use in my battle with grief has been to be more anticipative of it. This weekend caught me off guard. I was not expecting it and don't know what really triggered it. I suppose that not only does grief affect everyone differently it affects us at unpredictable times and for unpredictable reasons. I would have to say that I was spiraling out of control there for a little while. I think what helped me put this episode behind me was attending church and being surrounded by people that care about us and are concerned for us.
You have to surround yourself with good people. People that are willing to understand and not question your grief even when they don't understand. People that lift you up or give you the ability to lift yourself up. Nothing does me more good than to be surrounded by these people. Not just folks that are willing to help with a meal or a ride to school. While those are important people, just as important are those that are just there for you. Those that are willing to throw their arm around you and tell you they love you. Those that are willing to not judge you but are willing listen to your constant babbling and ranting about your loved lost one.
I am fine and back on track. I suppose in hindsight, announcing this work to everyone on Friday was not the best timing. Oh well, like Lisa always said, It is what it is. I am doing better today and looking forward to the completion of a busy week. Matt's party Friday, Mom & Dad's anniversary Saturday and Abby shipping off to camp on Sunday.
It's Monday evening so it's off to guitar lessons.